Spring is indeed in the air! And as we turn our thoughts to fresh, new things in our lives, we begin to think about flowers and picnics and, invariably, love and romance. This is the time of year when we emerge from our winter hibernations looking to take long walks in the park with our “special someone.” You might even catch some of those old married couples holding hands or sneaking a little kiss. Spring just does that to you. We, at Point of View, don’t want to dampen your spirits, but we do want to take an opportunity to talk to you about why romance in the workplace is not a good idea.

Let me start out by saying that we all have at least one friend, or a friend of a friend, or a friend of a cousin, who met, dated and married a co-worker who just happened to be their soul mate. For now, let’s put that person in the category of “exceptionally blessed.” For every one of those people, there are five others who can tell you a horror story about dating someone at work. By the way, I am also not referring to married couples that decide to work at the same place – they face a different set of issues.

I’m here to give you three good reasons why you shouldn’t date a co-worker:

“The Break-up Factor”

You and your new love interest may be floating on cloud nine right now, but what happens if and when you decide that working with the one you used to love feels too much like taking sand to the beach. You may each be mature enough to handle the discomfort of those weekly staff meetings, but what happens when you’re paired up to work on a project? All of a sudden, you are no longer able to simply pass each other in the hall without having to meet eyes.

Working with your “ex” can be like having a paper cut on the inside of your index finger. Every time you think it’s just about healed, you bend your finger and that burning, stinging sensation comes rushing back to haunt you.

“The Privacy Factor”

There’s always one person in every office that appears to have nothing better to do than to mind your business. This particular person will be the first to discover and first to broadcast the news of your relationship. He will always be ready, willing and able to report on any and all late breaking information – your weekend get-away to the Berkshires, the new piece of jewelry you received, that ugly disagreement you had in the employee parking lot, the private words you exchanged (and he overheard) in the break room.

When you date someone you work with, your relationship is in a fishbowl.

“The Policy Factor”

Many employers have specific policies that prohibit co-workers from dating. These tend to focus special attention on relationships between managers and subordinates. Policies like these are often put in place to protect the subordinate from managers who may use their position to take advantage of or influence an employee. It also aims to avoid fallout related to the “Break-up Factor.” You may think you’re keeping your little policy violation secret, but remember there’s always the “Privacy Factor” to contend with. Your secret relationship is never really secret. If you’re the manager dating your employee, you need to be especially wary!

So instead of being tempted, get together with a group of your single friends and make a pact to connect one another with your cute and single co-workers. And always remember my grandmother’s sage advice: “Don’t get your honey where you make your bread!” n